


Hearts Never in Tune

by deliciousshame



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drunken Shenanigans, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-07 11:51:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12232272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deliciousshame/pseuds/deliciousshame
Summary: If this is what drinking brings him, Tetsuya is now sober. It'll be worth it just to never have to look at himself in such a state again.





	Hearts Never in Tune

Tetsuya thinks he was woken up by his pounding headache. That or the incredibly blinding light, take your pick. He knew he should have drunk more water and less alcohol.

His hand darts out of the covers to look for a glass of water or better, some medication for his hangover, but he only finds his phone. Maybe he should take a look to see if everyone got home safely. Kise might still be looking for his keys even now.

He reads Midorima-kun’s message first, because he’ll probably be more informative about what happened than, say, Murasakibara-kun or Kise-kun himself. Except that instead of anything helpful, he’s faced with what appears to be a picture of himself and Aomine-kun making out.

Tetsuya shoves his phone back where it came from and pulls the covers over his head. He’s still way too hungover to deal with his drunken shenanigans. 

Except that hours later, even when he’s better-rested, well hydrated and medicated, he still can’t make sense of the picture. How drunk must he have been to have kissed Aomine-kun like that, never mind in public? Even via the screen of his phone, he can tell that wasn’t a small inebriated peck, on no. He seems to be halfway through removing Aomine-kun’s shirt, who has a hand down the back of Tetsuya’s pants. Who even took this picture? It can’t be Midorima-kun. He would have done the responsible thing and stopped them. It’s probably Takao-kun who stumbled upon them, found the whole thing hilarious, took a picture and send it to Midorima-kun… and everyone else they knew, apparently. 

Great. 

The worse of this tragedy isn’t the texts he’s getting, though he’ll have to read those with more attention later. It’s the fact that he doesn’t remember anything about what happened. At all. He got this close to Aomine-kun, and he can’t for the life of him remember what he tasted like, or how his lips feel against his, or the warmth of his hands on his fevered skin. What a waste.

He should probably call him to get their story straight before they face the others, but Aomine-kun surely isn’t awake at this hour. 

So Tetsuya takes that second look at those messages. He didn’t get it wrong the first time. He’s not getting disgust, incomprehension or even astonishment. It’s either some slight surprise (Kagami-kun and the rest of Seirin, mostly) or congratulations on getting out of the closet (the Generation of Miracles.) Even Seirin is more surprised that, in Kagami-kun’s words, “he finally managed to get his shit together and date Aomine instead of looking at him from afar and sighing”. No matter how his discussion with Aomine-kun goes, he’ll have words with Kagami-kun about that. Tetsuya isn’t a blushing schoolgirl. He’s a mature college student that knows how not to pursuit a hopeless relationship. He’s not stupid enough to think that just because Aomine-kun was willing when incredibly intoxicated means he really wants Tetsuya. He seems like the type that would hit on anything that moves if given enough to drink. That’s probably closer to what really happened than Tetsuya’s preferred version of the event. 

So he continues reading in appalled fascination. Takao-kun offers to throw them an official coming out party. Kise-kun sends him the most begrudging congratulations he ever had the chance to read, to the point that Tetsuya feels like trying to console him. Momoi-san wants to know how he managed to keep this from her and how long this had been going on. Hyuuga-senpai asks him what he drank and is he okay, which is nice of him. 

When he’s done with all of them, it’s late enough to try and call Aomine-kun. He lets the phone ring into it cuts, then calls back again. He’ll do this until Aomine-kun is annoyed enough to reply (or turn off his phone). 

“What.”

Tetsuya isn’t exactly surprised to hear his hoarse voice, probably rough from lack of sleep. “Aomine-kun? Hello. I hope you’re doing well this morning.”

“…Tetsu?”

Did he not see who was calling before answering? “Yes.”

“…Shit.” And he hangs up on Tetsuya.

Tetsuya takes a deep breath. This is not going to work on him.

He calls back. Aomine-kun turned off his phone. 

Tetsuya sighs and prepares to go out. Aomine-kun is not going to run away from him. 

A little while later, he’s knocking on the door of Aomine-kun’s small apartment, futilely, of course. “Aomine-kun, if you don’t open the door right now, I’ll call Momoi-san and tell her we’re having a lover’s spat because of what happened yesterday. I’ll say I’m very hurt by this and you won’t let me apologise. She’ll run over there with her copy of your key, you know she will, and I’ll watch you flounder as you try and fail to convince her I was lying.”

Sure enough, the door unlocks and opens to reveal a slightly less attractive than usual version of Aomine-kun, with bags under his eyes and a grumpier air. “You’re an asshole.”

Tetsuya shrugs. “I’m effective. Are you going to let me in, or we’re having this conversation on your doorstep?” It’s an empty threat. Tetsuya wouldn’t want to bother all of Aomine-kun’s neighbors, and if he was more aware he would use this against Tetsuya, but this morning Aomine-kun just sighs and moves to let him in. 

Tetsuya sits down. Aomine-kun somehow presents him with a cup of tea. If he remembered to be polite to his guest, he’s not too angry at him. “So, about yesterday.”

Aomine-kun shoves a hand in his hair and sighs. “Look, we were both drunk as fuck. How about we just forget it ever happened and go on?”

Tetsuya stares at him. “Do you need me to show you my phone? I believe Takao-kun has taken a very fetching picture of us. Your old teammates from Touou are probably questioning your tastes right now.”

Aomine-kun frowns. “Hey.”

“What?”

“Don’t talk about… Whatever, I don’t feel like getting into this right now. Is it that bad? I didn’t have the courage to check my messages yet.”

“What, you remember what happened?” That’s not fair! Tetsuya wants to remember it too! 

“…You don’t?! Not at all? Not even… Nothing?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“Damn it, why are you such a lightweight? Wait, are you even safe to go around by yourself? You must still be feeling like shit if it hit you that hard. Want some medicine? I’m sure I’ve got some stuff somewhere.” 

Tetsuya stops him before he goes looking, despite how unfair it is that they’ve got a minor crisis on their hands and he’s still more concerned about Tetsuya’s well-being that his own reputation. “Don’t worry, I took what was necessary. I’m fine. More importantly, what do we do about it?”

Aomine-kun just stares at him like he just said something strange. “…Nothing?”

If only it was that easy. “You do realise that everyone thinks we’ve been together for a while and this was our coming-out?”

Aomine-kun just continues to stare at him. “…Just read your phone, would you? I’ll wait.”

So Tetsuya ends up drinking his tea while Aomine-kun makes a variety of disgusted and embarrassed faces at his screen. In one particular occasion, he chokes on his coffee. Tetsuya already didn’t want to know what Touou thought about him, so he doesn’t ask, just pats his back gently until it passes. 

When Aomine-kun ends up pushing his phone as far as possible and slumps over his table, Tetsuya figures he has finally understood the gravity of their situation. “Why are we friends with those jerks.”

Tetsuya shrugs. “Everyone that plays basketball is a bit of a jerk, I think.”

Aomine-kun looks like he’s going to argue, but stops himself. “Eh. True. So. What do you wanna do about it?”

“We set them straight, I guess.” What else could they do?

“So we tell them, what, that we’re not together? Cause they’ve got their mind set and some pretty damning evidence.”

“Still, won’t trying to convince them be easier than dealing with Momoi-san or Kise-kun? Plus, what else are we going to do? It's not like there are many other options left to us.”

"I just don't wanna talk it. Can't we just shut up and let them think whatever they want. Seems easier."

...What. "You don't care that everyone thinks we're dating? You're straight." That really doesn't seem like the Aomine-kun he knows. Not that he cares what other people think of him, but that will ruin his chances with women.

Aomine-kun stares at him with a strange look on his face, and sighs. "Not really. Hell, it might even be fun to watch Kagami's or Kise's face when I make a move on you. Hey, let's bet on which of our old teammates will freak out the worse."

This is not what he expected when he came here this morning. "You... want to turn this into a prank."

Aomine-kun grins at him. "Yeah! It's a good opportunity to have a good laugh at all those assholes."

"...Really? Really, Aomine-kun? Are you sure this is a good idea?"

But Aomine-kun doesn't say a word. He just keeps staring at him with that wide smile on his face, and Tetsuya has never been able to say no to that face. He knows there is no way this will turn out fine, but he sighs and acquiesces anyway. 

The messes he gets himself in.

_________________

After the whole debacle with Aomine-kun, Tetsuya decides he deserves a whole day to himself before he starts dealing with the consequences of it all. There's a book he's been meaning to read for days. He'd planned to run some errands and study a bit, but forget it. He goes right back to his small apartment, locks the door behind him and goes right for his novel. A few pages in and he's dead to the rest of the world, engrossed. He only surfaces to eat a little when he gets too hungry to focus. Nothing else manages to disturb him. He thinks his phone might have rung. Maybe. Maybe there were knocks at his door. He might have heard a "Kurokochiiiiii" in the distance. It is his day off, so he can’t be bothered to check. 

_________________

He does have class on Monday morning, but he thinks he might be able to attend without too much trouble. His basketball colleagues have spread far and wide, and there are some at his university, but none of them are in this class with him, or, as far as he knows, have friends here. He'll still be able to enjoy a few hours of peace, maybe even a day or two.

Cheered at the idea, he sits beside Nakamura-san and Fujimori-kun and asks them about the novel. It ties them over until the arrival of the professor, and time flies until the class is over. Fujimori-kun invites him to lunch, but he declines. He's about to explain that he's going straight home to work on an essay, but he chokes on his sentence halfway through when he spots Aomine-kun through the now open door, lying against the hallway's wall, probably waiting for him. Fujimori-kun follows his line of sight. "A friend of yours?" Tetsuya falters. How is he supposed to answer this question again? Aomine-kun, the living incarnation of tall, dark and handsome, isn't exactly blending in. He's already attracting interested glances. Tetsuya knows he needs to move this on, fast, before it becomes local gossip.

"Ooh, is that your boyfriend? He is, right? C'mon, Fujimori, let's go meet him."

Damn it. He didn't count on Nakamura-san's more... forthright personality. "You really shouldn't bother yourself with-"

"Nonsense! I'm sure he's curious about us too. Anyway, you basketball types need to meet more people not obsessed with chasing balls."

Tetsuya supposes one look at Aomine-kun makes it obvious that's how they know each other. "Why does he have to be my boyfriend?" Why would anyone think Aomine-kun would choose him? He could have his pick. Tetsuya himself is unremarkable in all points. At first glance, they don’t exactly strike strangers as a match made in heaven.

"From the way you're staring, he's either that, your long-lost brother who doesn't look a thing like you or the enemy you've sworn to kill all those years ago after he burned down your village and slaughtered your parents." She takes a second look at Aomine-kun. "...He didn't kill your parents, right? He looks kind of mean."

"He’s not mean! And no!"

She grins. "Boyfriend it is! Let's go let's go let's go.” She dashes toward the door, leaving Tetsuya behind, feeling flummoxed. “Hello! My name is Nakamura Yukari! You must be Kuroko's boyfriend! Pleased to meet you!"

Nakamura-san's loud voice carries. Tetsuya winces at the various reactions across the room, surprise, disbelief and even disgust marring his classmates' faces. Nakamura-san doesn't care what other people think, so she's not really mindful. Tetsuya doesn't really care either, but he likes his private life to stay that way.

Another person that obviously never cared about other people's opinions is Aomine-kun, who is apparently warming up to Nakamura-san faster than Tetsuya would like him to. Next thing he knows they'll be sharing all their favorite anecdotes about him failing at life. He needs to stop this, fast. "This is nice, but we're going to be late. Aomine-kun, let's go." He grabs his hand, refusing to let himself be distracted by the feel of it, and drags him away, trying not to listen to Nakamura-san's ebullient laughter.

He only speaks to Aomine-kun after they have passed the gates of the university. "What were you thinking, coming to pick me up in my classroom? Even waiting for me by the gates would have been a bit much! The least you could have done is warn me if you wanted to see me. I would have gone to meet you."

Aomine-kun shrugs, but Tetsuya can see he's having fun, that jerk. "Seemed like something a good boyfriend would do."

"What does visiting my school has to do with pranking our friends?! Do you realise you’ve just shoved me out the closet!”

Aomine-kun opens his mouth, visibly decides to bite that sentence back, and goes with “it’s not an especially comfortable place to be. I don’t get why you’d want to stay in there.”

Breathing. Tetsuya must keep breathing. Killing Aomine-kun won’t help. Sure, he won’t have to deal with him anymore, but on the other hand, he won’t have to deal with him anymore. “I’m sure this seems simple to someone like you, but I assure you it’s not. You do not get to make this kind of decision for me.” He stops squeezing his fists when he feels his nails biting into his flesh. He forces himself to relax his hands and to keep on breathing, slow and steady. 

Aomine-kun, of course, notices all this. “…Sorry. I didn’t think it would piss you off this much. I’ll go straighten things him with your friends.”

Tetsuya does not feel like explaining there’s no way Nakamura-san would believe him, having reached her own conclusions by herself, and that if she doesn’t, no one else will. They’ll believe her account before Tetsuya’s, thinking he’s embarrassed. He sighs. “Don’t bother. I’ll deal with it. Let’s just go home.” He just wants to put this all behind him and move on. Hopefully the rest of the world will get the message.

“At least let me treat you to lunch. I won’t feel better if I don’t do at least this much.”

Well, Tetsuya is hungry, so. “Fine.”

When, a few minutes later, Tetsuya finds himself drinking his usual milkshake and looking over Aomine-kun engulfing enough food for two teams (if they don’t include Kagami-kun, of course) he resolves to stop letting Aomine-kun play him like a fiddle. Only he could convince Tetsuya to forgive him for outing him by taking him on a date. 

Or at least it looks enough like one that he could fool himself into thinking there’s some truth behind this whole charade, if he was stupid. Which he isn’t. Just because they got drunk and made out once doesn’t mean it meant anything. Aomine-kun isn’t his. He’ll never be. Tetsuya just has to deal with it.

Aomine-kun is grinning at him from the other side of the table, obviously pleased with himself, and Tetsuya can’t help the fondness he feels at the sight. 

…So that whole dealing thing isn’t going well. 

He’s in trouble.

_________________

People gossip and giggle during the next class he shows up at, but they don’t do much more. That’s nothing he can’t handle. If anything, if his classmates are distracted in class, he’ll be higher in the overall ranking. Plus, it’s not like his college friends mind. They’re not the problem.

He toys with his phone. He really needs to stop ignoring said problem and start placating his basketball friends before Kise-kun decides to imitate Aomine-kun and shows up to pick him up, leaving a trail of dazed fangirls behind him. The last thing he wants is being obligated to deliver love letters to him. 

He doesn’t know what Aomine-kun was even thinking. No, the messages did not die down. Well, the people with sense have understood that he'd prefer to be left alone, but that makes, what, three of them? 

Tetsuya keeps bad company.

As if to prove him right, Nakamura-san launches into her next attempt at trying to get Aomine-kun to come to their study group (Ha!), never mind that they have no class in common, or that he’s not a student at their college, or even that they’re in different fields of study altogether. She just wants him to be there so that he has to go drink with them afterwards, which is Not happening. To begin with, Tetsuya does not drink anymore. He’s not letting that kind of mess happen again.

That’s the reason he used to turn Kagami-kun down the other day. He hopes Aomine-kun enjoys his efforts to his cause, because the absence of denial over what happened the other day was noted. Oh, was it noted. Not saying anything did exactly was he thought it would: fuel the fire. Even via phone he could tell Kagami-kun was both incredibly amused and completely disturbed now that he has gotten used to the idea. 

Tetsuya sighs. If only he could tell Aomine-kun to go fuck himself and tell everyone the truth; that they were both incredibly drunk and that Aomine-kun is just that bored. He always bored easily. People would believe it. They’d be considerate and trash talk Aomine-kun with him. Kise-kun would tell him about that one time he went to an industry party and slept with a fashion journalist and now is deadly worried he’ll read about his performance in the pages of a magazine. Everyone would make fun of him and agree that’s way worse and they’d all forget it ever happened. 

Okay, half of them would act like it never happened and the other half would remind him of it constantly, but no one would take it seriously. Tetsuya could just bury that stupid crush down until, well, not until it fades, that hasn’t been working out, but until someone new comes around or Aomine-kun gets married, it seems.

Back to class. He has to focus. He can’t keep wasting time worrying about the inevitable. 

_________________

_Hey, there’s a party on campus Friday night and I told everyone I was bringing my date._

_That’s you, by the way._

Oh god, what now.

_Why._

_Practise._

…What.

_What do you mean, practise?_

_We’ll have to be convincing when we meet people, right? So, practise._

_Practise… to fool our friends credibly?_ Really?

_Yeah! Now you’re getting it. They’ll be some people we know, like that dude from Kaijou and some of Midorima’s old teammates, but it should be ok. Ryou’ll be there too, you two can be polite at each other._

Tetsuya guesses there are worse things than going to a party, one of which would be trying to convince Aomine-kun to stop going down this dark, dark path. He’ll be invisible anyway.

_Fine._

_Great! Come over._

Now what.

_I feel like I’m repeating myself, but why._

_Practise! To be convincing at the party._

_We’re… practising for practise? Do you realise that makes no sense._

_Do you want to look ridiculous at the party? Or like you’re a terrible date?_

_Well, no._

_See? Come to place after class. I’ll have pizza._

And that’s how it is, because Tetsuya has proven time and time again that he cannot say no to Aomine-kun.

_________________

“Hey. Want some pizza?”

Tetsuya takes the offered slice. What else is he going to do? “Thank you.”

He sits down on the couch with his pizza, fidgeting. Can’t Aomine-kun see that Tetsuya has no idea how to play this whole thing? What does he even want?

“So, convincing couple! How do we do it?”

“You’re asking _me_?”

“Who else am I gonna ask?” 

“Don’t ask anyone!”

Aomine-kun pouts at him. Oh god. Why. “C’mon, you said you’d play along.”

Tetsuya did not, in fact, say so, but reminding him of that wouldn’t help. “I have no idea how to help you. Don’t call me here if you don’t know why.” How does one look lovey-dovey? Does Aomine-kun want him to give pet names or, or hold his hand in public!? He couldn’t. It wouldn’t be proper. He’s blushing just thinking about it.

“Hey, perv, stop blushing. No matter how much you beg for it, I’m not going to defile you in public. Not that it wouldn’t work, but I have principles.”

_Defile!?_ Plus, he’s obviously lying. Tetsuya has photographic evidence to the contrary. “You’re the only one with such a perverted mind. I was just embarrassed on your behalf. To think you’re already unsure how to continue that scheme of yours.”

“Hey! I don’t _need_ help. I was just asking to be polite. I know _exactly_ how to make us look genuine.”

Tetsuya doesn’t trust the purr in his voice _at all_. “Why call me at all then?”

“Maybe I just wanted to see you.”

DANGER. DANGER. ABORT MISSION, I REPEAT, ABORT MISSION. “I’m flattered, really, but I have a report to hand over soon, so if you don’t need me here I’m going back home.”

Aomine-kun looks at him and sighs. “I really don’t get you.”

..What does that have to do with anything? “I don’t understand you either.” And if some of his confused bitterness comes through, there’s nothing he can do about it.

Aomine-kun smirks. “See, we’re well matched.”

“Then no one will have trouble believing we’re a couple. Congratulations. Your scheme is back on track.”

“So all we have to do is argue in public and then make up. I’m pretty sure we can make that work.”

Well, if he uses Midorima-kun and Takao-kun as examples, maybe Aomine-kun is right. “So that’s taken care of. I’m leaving now.”

“Do you have to?”

“Yes. Stop whining. We’re going to see each other again soon. There’s that party, right?”

Aomine-kun visibly cheers up. Tetsuya feels himself melt. “You'd better have cleaned up nicely. Can’t have you shame me in public.”

Tetsuya doesn’t even bother to answer him. He just waves him goodbye as he leaves.

_________________

“Are you seriously dating Aomine? Like, seriously? You’re not that ugly. You could totally do better.”

Aomine-kun had not told him that Wakamatsu-senpai would be there. “Are you making a pass at me? I must warn you, Aomine-kun is the jealous type.” He isn’t, as far as Tetsuya can tell, but maybe it will deter Wakamatsu-senpai.

In fact, Aomine-kun, that jerk, is trying and failing to look like he’s not realising what’s happening. He’s chatting with some people Tetsuya doesn’t know, just a few metres away. Tetsuya knows he’s aware of him because every few seconds he turns toward him and stifles his laughter with another swallow of his beer. 

“What the hell! I’m not! Who would go for Aomine’s sloppy seconds.”

Tetsuya frowns. That’s just rude. 

“Hey! Be polite to Tetsu, asshole.”

Of course, now is when Aomine-kun decides to make his presence known. “Aomine-kun, don’t bother.”

Alas, it is already too late. Wakamatsu-senpai took Aomine-kun’s intervention with his usual grace, except that Aomine-kun is now responding to him with equal vitriol. At this point, Tetsuya just hopes it doesn’t come to blows. 

_________________

_Kuroko, tell me Aomine didn’t really punch a guy to defend your honor last night._

Tetsuya really wishes he could say just that. Sadly, he can’t.

To think he hasn’t even met one of his closer friends in person yet.

This is not going well.

_________________

Tetsuya wakes up two days after that disastrous party groggy. His sleep has been lacking lately. On most nights, he’s already plagued by fleeting fragments of dreams he can’t quite remember, remnants of that drunken folly with Aomine-kun. How annoying that he still doesn’t quite know what happened. And now, on top of that, he spent the whole night haunted by the memory of Aomine-kun at that last party, staying too close and trying to get him a drink he kept refusing. Except in the dream Tetsuya doesn’t refuse, and instead of leaving to go talk with other people they stay together all night, talking and laughing and breathing the same air.

Enough is enough. He’s played along with Aomine-kun’s crazy idea for longer than he should have. In fact, he shouldn’t have allowed it from the start. Nothing good came out of it for him. The constant glimpses into what he could never have aren’t helping him out in any way. It’s not even a very funny joke to play on people. If anything, he’s the butt of that joke. Maybe Aomine-kun finds the idea of them dating hilarious, but Tetsuya really can’t say the same. 

He knows that if he wants to put an end to that charade once and for all, the easiest way to do it is by himself, by which he means throwing Aomine-kun to the wolves. 

Since this is how the whole mess started, Tetsuya honors the tradition and just send a mass message containing the following words: _Regarding my relationship with Aomine-kun, we’re not really dating. We were just drunk. Aomine-kun thought it would be funny to let you believe we were. I should have stopped him, and for that I apologise._

There. It’s done. Tetsuya can just go back to ignore his phone until the fallout has passed.

…Yeah, right. Tetsuya expects something to explode in his face in the following hours at the latest. 

…It’s sunny outside. Maybe he can go take a nice, calming walk for a little while. 

_________________

It’s not like he is surprised to see Aomine sitting on the floor, his back to the door. Tetsuya definitely expected him to show up to tell him off for ruining his fun. Whatever. He’s already decided he’d rather deal with this than be stuck where he currently is forever. 

Now, to see if his resolve holds. “Aomine-kun. Hello.”

Aomine-kun turns to look at him and sighs. “Just let me in.”

Tetsuya can do that. 

A key and a few minutes later, Aomine-kun is sitting in front of him, each of them with a cup of tea but neither of them feeling like drinking it. Tetsuya looks at the steaming liquid in front of him and wonders if he should be the one breaking the silence. No. Aomine-kun started it, he can continue to do so. 

He takes a sip. He doesn’t taste it. 

He takes another one anyway. 

“Are you gonna ignore me until I leave or are you gonna say something?”

The first one looks good to him. “What do you want me to say? I thought my feelings on the matter were obvious.”

Aomine-kun laughs at him. Right in his face. It’s not a nice laugh. “Tetsu, the only thing your feelings are obvious about is basketball. Hell, we wouldn’t be in this mess if you could talk instead of staring ahead like a robot.”

Is Aomine-kun… blaming him? Really? 

How dare he. “I have no idea how this could possibly be my fault. Please, enlighten me.” Even he can hear the frost in his voice.

“I can’t, you remember fucking nothing!”

…Oh. That’s… unexpected. “Did something happen while I was drunk? Besides what’s obvious, I mean.”

“Maybe, maybe not! It’s not like you can tell!”

This is going nowhere. “Either tell me why you’re this angry or come back when you’re willing to.” This silent anger isn’t what he was expecting when he sent the message. He imagined Aomine-kun would be annoyed, maybe a bit frustrated at having his fun cut short. That’s not what’s happening right now, and that’s confusing. And maddening. 

“…You really don’t remember a thing about what happened that night, right?”

“No. I thought I said that already.”

“Do you wanna know what you did?”

He would have preferred to remember by himself, but it’s probably not going to happen at this point. At least, if he knows he’ll be able to do something about it and maybe soothe whatever is disturbing Aomine-kun this badly. “Yes. Tell me.”

Aomine-kun takes a deep breath. “Do you even remember how you got this drunk?”

Hmm… “I think someone forced drinks on me.” Now that he thinks about it, he has no idea how that happened. He’s not a good drinker and he knows it. He usually takes a beer or two and stops. His friends often need babysitting anyway. 

“Yeah, no. Akashi’s knockoff sat beside you and mocked your drinking power. Before I knew it, you were drinking your way toward unconsciousness and he was just mocking you more, so I stole you away before I had to drag you to the hospital.”

“You’re lying.” Mayuzumi-san wasn’t even there, and he wouldn’t let himself be taunted by such flagrant provocation. 

“No I’m not. I think you might have drunk a little bit too much even before he arrived. You were walking around and deliberately appearing out of nowhere to freak people out, then you smiled at them. It was creepy. Hilarious, but creepy.” 

“Aomine-kun, there’s no way that happened.” He wouldn’t have. He knows he wouldn’t have.

He shrugs. “Hey, you don’t have to believe me.”

Tetsuya really isn’t convinced, but he might as well listen to the whole thing before he judges. “Please continue.”

“So I was trying to drag you somewhere you could sober up a little, maybe drink some water to help the upcoming hangover. You weren’t making it easy. At first, I thought you couldn’t walk straight anymore, but I understood later that you were all over me because you were making a pass at me and being terrible at it.”

…Damn it. Damn it all. He really doesn’t think Aomine-kun is lying. He doesn’t look like he is. Plus, it’s not like if he really, really got drunk, that wasn't the kind of thing he can see himself doing. Hit on Aomine-kun while he can dismiss it as nonsense if necessary probably seemed like a wonderful plan at the time. 

Aomine-kun continues. “Out of the blue, you asked me if I had a girlfriend right now. I said no. You asked me if I had a boyfriend right now. I started thinking something was going on at that point, because you don’t usually ask about my relationships. I said no. You asked me if I wanted a boyfriend. At this point I was starting to get what you were getting at, so I said I wasn’t against it, and you then you fell down my throat and after that Takao showed up, so we stopped. You were pretty far gone at that point, so I took you home, ignoring the terrible passes at me I didn’t know you had in you by the way. And that’s it for that night.”

How is Tetsuya supposed to answer to this tale? Ridiculous? Of course it is. Impossible? Sadly not. “I apologise for having been this rude.” There. That’s a start. 

Aaand it didn’t work. If anything, Aomine-kun, who had quieted a little while telling the story, becomes visibly more annoyed. “I don’t want fucking apologies! If I had been offended, I’d have stopped you and that would have been that! Anyway, I knew you would feel like shit the next morning, but I didn’t think you wouldn’t remember, or freak the fuck out at what you did! What was I supposed to do about _that_! I’ve been into you for a while now, and I had no idea if you were just out of your mind at the time or just tipsy enough to find the guts to confess, but now you were panicking. Confessing didn’t seem like the right thing to do, so I improvised. Sue me! That kind of stuff works in movies! I didn’t think you’d hate it that much! It’s not like you told _me_ about it before complaining to everyone we knew, asshole!”

Tetsuya wishes he could tell Aomine-kun to just shut up and go take a hike for a few hours. He needs time to think all this through. At the moment, he just has no idea how to even react to all this. Did he even comprehend all Aomine-kun said? He doesn’t even know where to begin after that rant. 

“You’re not even gonna answer me!?”

“I’m thinking. Please wait a little.” He busies himself with the now even less tempting cup of tea and doesn’t look at Aomine-kun’s reaction to this. 

He hears him curse and mumble under his breath anyway.

So. Apparently, he got drunk enough to hit on Aomine-kun. Okay, let’s begin by accepting this as truth. Nothing can start without this much. He hit on Aomine-kun and Aomine-kun reciprocated. He did, right? He did. Tetsuya has photographic proof of this. Plus, since he remembered it all, he can’t have been anywhere near as addled as Tetsuya himself was. The next day, Tetsuya himself didn’t remember and was appalled at the result of his own actions, but when he tried to smooth it out Aomine-kun stopped him. He unveiled his brilliant idea for a prank. Tetsuya didn’t stop him because he’s powerless against Aomine-kun. He went along with it until he didn’t, which bring them to this moment.

Now, what to do about it all. “Aomine-kun.”

In barely a second, Aomine-kun rises from lying on his table. “You’re finally done thinking. Good. I was gonna fall asleep in a few minutes top.”

Yes, well. “In the end, what was the point of the joke?”

Aomine-kun… is blushing. “For fuck’s sake, can’t you tell?”

He has an idea, but. “I want to hear it from you.”

“Fine, fine, whatever. It’s not like I didn’t confess hours ago.” A pause. “At first, the idea of having to tell everyone that what I wanted was just a mistake was just too shitty to contemplate. Later, well, might as well have fun with it. Even later, it seemed like a good way to test whether you were into me or not. Not that it worked, but hey, I tried.”

…So, pretty much what he imagined he would say. 

Tetsuya takes a deep breath and tries to quiet down the suddenly too fast beating of his heart. “For your information, I did feel tested. It was quite troublesome. Imagine how you would feel if someone you were attracted to kept falsely hitting on you.” Here. That should be enough. 

Tetsuya looks at Aomine-kun to see how he took the news. Who, of course, won’t meet his eyes. It’s probably his time to wait.

“Oh well, at least it all worked out in the end… It worked out, right? Right??”

Tetsuya takes Aomine-kun’s hand, hoping he’s not being too forward. Considering they already made out in public, it’s probably fine. “I think we can say that.”

_________________

_If everyone would just forget I ever sent that last message, I’d be forever grateful. Please excuse me again for all the trouble._

**Author's Note:**

> Bonus
> 
> _Kurokocchiiii!! You can’t play with my heart like that! It’s not fair!!!!_   
>  _Kurokocchi!! Answer me!!_   
>  _Kise, stop involving everyone in your unrequited suit._   
>  _Yeah, Kise-chin. You’re annoying. It’s not like you ever had a chance._   
>  _I’m afraid I have to agree with the others. Momoi gave up months ago. You should do the same. It was only a matter of time._   
>  _I hate you all ;_;_


End file.
